Ask AANW: I Want Everyone Attending My Wedding To Surrender Their Smartphones…..

Hi AANW,
Happy new year! I am getting married in July and already started the planning process. On my big day, I want anyone attending to surrender their phones, ipads, or any other device they might use to capture or update social media sites on the day of. Before anyone starts judging, i have my reasons.

First, I want all the attention on me (call me a diva if you like but it’s our day after all). I don’t want any horrible pics online nor have anybody disrupting the order of my day as they hustle for pics. I don’t want my day broadcasted live online before I even get a chance to do it myself :). I’ll have accommodation in place for people to check in their devices or they can save me the stress and leave it in their car.

I discussed this with family and everyone is against it. My hubby doesn’t care as long as I am happy. I am honestly thinking about moving forward with this. What is your expert advice on this? Help me! How do I tell people about this policy? Before the wedding or the day of?

-Febi

Hi Febi,
Congrats on your upcoming nuptials. Hmmmm why are you trying to do this na? What about people like us that live for updates on weddings from our feeds across social sites? Not fair o 🙂

Seriously speaking now, I totally understand your stance and no, you are not a diva. We all want different things and this just happens to be yours. Smartphones or tablets at weddings are a blessing and a curse. Just the same way you think a guest could capture a horrible picture of you with their device, they can also capture a fabulous, perhaps your favorite shot or moment which your photographer didn’t get, and you might not have seen otherwise.

However, some guests get a little too tech-crazy. From tweets to Facebook updates to instagram, they go bananas and they can interfere with your professional photos with their camera flash, and their physical body or shadow. I mean lets not even get started on those that carry a whole tablet or ipad and feel the need to be the videographer of the day right in front of you. Most importantly, these tech-crazy attendees dissuade other guests from attending. I mean why attend when you can tune in to your favorite social site and get live updates, pics and videos on the big day.

Let me say that you won’t be the first to do so or impose such. I mean Tiwa Savage had such at her traditional wedding and Lagbaja also enforced it at his daughter’s wedding. Tiwa Savage and Lagbaja are Nigerian celebrities and musical artistes. However, this practice has sparked a lot of debate among brides, grooms and guests alike. I mean imagine a case of emergency and a guest at your wedding couldn’t be reached because of your rule. People could also be lost on their way to your big day. How would they reach someone already at the venue for directions? So many pros and cons of imposing this.

I can tell you one thing though, if you let your guests know prior, it might deter them from attending, especially those who depend heavily on their phones for business or personal reasons. If you let them know at the venue, they won’t turn back but they’ll be grumpy and chances are they’ll raise their voices so loud (Naija too dey like shout) that you would hear at the altar. If you finally succeed in having them leave their phone behind, be prepared to have disruptions from people getting up to go check their phones for messages or missed calls.

I hope you make the right decision for you! Oh and please do let us know what you end up doing 🙂

-AANW

I am curious to see what others feel about this from the bride/groom perspective and also as wedding guests.

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